Anxiety disorders affect over 40 million adults in the U.S. every year. While anxiety it is an natural response when we are confronted with a potential threat, if left untreated and without support, it can turn into something that affects our daily lives. Anxiety not only affects those who experience it but also their loved ones. Support relationships are essential in seeking anxiety support and strengthen coping and healing.
Thank you for reading this post, don't forget to subscribe!Below are 7 ways you can support your loved one struggling with anxiety:
1. Educate Yourself About Anxiety
It is important for you as a loved one to educate yourself about anxiety disorders, its symptoms and common triggers. Here is a comprehensive article that outlines 7 Key Facts that Everyone Should Know about Anxiety. What may seem “normal” in your loved one could also be the beginning of an anxiety disorder. Understanding your loved one’s condition can reduce judgement and frustration and give you the appropriate tools to help them in a moment of crisis.
2. Practice Active and Non-Judgmental Listening
When we see our loved ones struggling, we may have the tendency to try to problem solve. After all, we care enough to try to bring a solution at hand. Listening, though, is often more helpful than offering immediate solutions. While you are listening to your loved one, make sure to maintain eye contact, avoid interrupted and validate their feelings. You can say things like “that sounds really hard” or “I can’t imagine going through that”.
There is a difference between having empathy and trying to “fix” anxiety. Having empathy means to be emotionally present while your loved one is speaking and trying to put yourself in their shoes. Never tell someone in the midst of an anxiety attack to “calm down”; if they could’ve, they would’ve. This can unintentionally communicate that their feelings are not valid. Non-judgmental listening also involves not trying to offer solutions in the moment or trying to find a silver lining. As Brené Brown states, rarely an empathetic response begins with “at least”.
3. Be Patient and Avoid Pressure
It is important to be patient and avoid pressure. Anxiety can cause someone to cancel plans after agreeing to them, seem distant or react irritably. While you can have boundaries, do not take these behaviors personally. Sometimes giving space to your loved one without making then feel guilty or letting them set the pace can go a long way. As stated before, it is important to avoid unhelpful statements, such as “just relax” or “stop worrying”.
4. Encourage Healthy Coping Strategies
If your loved one goes to therapy, when they are not feeling anxious, you can ask the about healthy coping strategies they have learned to manage their anxiety. This way when they are experiencing anxiety, you can engage in healthy coping skills, such as doing breathing exercises together, going for a walk and reminding them of grounding techniques.
It is important to not push coping strategies aggressively. Coping skills are like a tool box and just because they worked at a given moment, doesn’t mean that they will work the same. Pressure actually makes anxiety worst. You and your loved one can also engage in some lifestyle changes that help reduce stress overall, such as attending a yoga class together or engaging in meditation.
5. Support Professional Help (Without Forcing It)
Therapy along with other modalities, such as medication and support groups can help an individual understand their symptoms of anxiety, root causes and how to cope effectively. When gently suggesting professional help, be respectful and do it at the right time. Suggesting professional help in the middle of an anxiety attach is often not a good time to offer it. Use “I statements” instead of “You statements”. Say “I care about you and I wonder if talking to someone might help” rather than saying “You need therapy!”. Some of the practical ways you can help a loved on is by researching providers, offering transportation or attending their first appointment, if invited.
6. Take Care of Yourself Too
Often times we are so caught up in caring for our loved ones that we forget about ourselves. Truth is that supporting someone with anxiety can be emotionally draining at times. As a care taker, it is important for you to maintain your own self-care routines, set healthy boundaries and join support groups for caregivers if needed. Caring for yourself ultimately will help you be more present and supportive with your loved one.
7. Encourage Open and Ongoing Communication
It is important to maintain open and ongoing communication when caring for a loved one with anxiety. Don’t assume that needs and symptoms are the same over time; they could be better or worse. Creating a support plan together can help you know what to do to best support your loved one if you are having a panic or anxiety attack. A support plan can help you review coping skills, give words that feel comfortable and establish what needs to be avoided during intense moments of anxiety. Flexibility as you care for someone with anxiety is important as symptoms can change over time.
Dealing with anxiety can be challenging but having supportive relationships make a meaninful difference in the recovery process. It is important to trust the process and be patient with both yourself and your loved one. Compassion, understanding and education can help us navigate anxiety together.
If you or someone you know is experiencing anxiety symptoms, reach out to a mental health professional. Healing is possible, and no one needs to face anxiety alone.
Note: While I am a mental health professional, this information is not a substitute for a formal evaluation. If you or someone you know is struggling with mental health, please reach out at (407) 906-5214 to schedule an appointment for tailored support.
Mental health is a complex and highly individualized matter, and what works for one person may not work for another. The best course of action for anyone dealing with mental health concerns is to schedule an appointment with us for a personalized assessment, diagnosis, and treatment options. Please remember that seeking help from a licensed mental health expert is a vital step in addressing mental health challenges.
If you’re in crisis or experiencing thoughts of self-harm or suicide, contact emergency services or a crisis helpline immediately.